红色心形的爱

从小到大一直习惯把一切不好受的感觉都埋藏在心底的女孩，终于舍得把一切都放下了，心里当然还会隐隐作痛，但是女孩的心理是轻松的，甚至也希望男孩如此，也真心祝福男孩找到真爱永远幸福快乐，女孩这一放手真的觉得一切都是好的，只希望她的决定对男孩是一种解脱，勉强不会有幸福，只希望男孩心里会赶快振作起来，寻找下一道闪亮的彩虹……

本来就不怎么对别人说上自己心情的女孩想着这下真的轻松了，可是被女孩埋在深处的那一颗心会不会从此也不能再见光明，对家人是如此对朋友也是如此，一直都觉得自己不好的女孩，现在真的希望不会再有风波发生在她的身上，只想平平静静的为了自己的未来也好，为了让家人放下心也好，就只有向前的打拼了，不想再让生活留下任何的遗憾~

女孩真的相信一个人的她更能展现出她的能力，她的坚强，本来就是个乡巴佬的女孩，现在不也好好的站在这里吗？只记得当初一心只想着不增加父母的负担，至少要做到自己能养活自己的境界，为了以前的坏脾气让外婆吃了不少苦的女孩一定要争气，就只为了争一口气的女孩现在也不是过得 好好的吗？至于被封闭了的那一颗心就一切都随缘吧！女孩相信缘份一定会让她遇见一个能让这一颗心重见光明的人~

女孩的无奈1

多方面的压力往往让我想逃避，可逃得了一时却逃不了一世；从小到大都体验着不同的环境，还以为自己的应变能力很强，可我现在就好像一堆烂泥，什么事也做不好，学业也不比人好，人与人之间的沟通也不见得有进步，脾气也不见得有好转，我始终是那个不苟言笑，思想偏激的女生，为了讨喜别人而一直想隐藏这些对别人而言都是不能被接受的缺点真的很难受，甚至觉得自己因在意旁人的意见而变得不认识自己了，为什么？为什么我会那么的不看好我自己？为什么我那么的没信心？我的信心都到哪儿去了？

自己摸索了很久，我这才发现原来自己很自私~自私在希望当我不想解释的时候就会放弃追问原因；自私在希望当我想解释的时候会百分之百专心的倾听；自私在希望不管发生什么事都会对我百分之百的有信心；也许是我自己没有能力吧！也许这就是心高气傲的我吧！

女孩的无奈2

女孩从来都没有想过未来到底会怎样，因为女孩认为他的应变能力是一等一的，可是却没想到此时此刻的她却不知所措了起来~女孩想了又想还是找不到更好的解决办法，女孩对自己哥哥的劝告也一而再，再而三的考虑，可是到底应该怎么做才会是最好的？女孩很心疼，感觉到自己就好象做什么就错什么，可事实真的是这样吗？难道女孩就什么也不是吗？女孩怎么想也不明白，为什么要一个人承受这样的痛，难道男生和女生就不能平等的活在同一个空间里吗？为什么在别人的眼中，男孩就什么都是，女孩却什么都不是？女孩就这么点价值也没有吗？女孩难道就没有让别人感觉到她是有那么一点点地价值吗？哪怕就只有那么的一点点~

别人都说女孩的感觉是敏感的是准的，虽然我并没有不相信，可是从来都没有想过这样反而会让大家更受罪~

没有坏结局的命运和缘分

以现代生活来看，本来恋爱根本就是两个人的事，男人女人也本应该是平等；但是……也不知道是几时的事，日子越久我就越发现原来这些都只是逞强的女人而撑起面子的说法而已~也许不平等的地方就在大家的成功和委屈率不同吧！

女孩在认识他之前本来就是一个懒得解释的人，无论是喜是悲也全都往肚子里吞，可是现在女孩整天都向自己问着自己的性格到底是什么，难道为了男孩却要把自己的性格都隐藏起来从而配合男孩而显现出女孩的另一个自己吗？

在男孩之前，女孩本来就不多朋友，多数友人都会以女孩的娇宠脾气而抗拒女孩，可是女孩一点也不会去介意自己到底被哪些人抗拒，一心只想以自己的方式活出自我，但是在男孩过后，女孩就因为男孩的一句不喜欢而改变了，变得心里只要有男孩就什么主意都会因男孩而影响，本来女孩以为一切命运都会掌握在手中，但是因男孩的出现却觉得自己的命运被掌握在男孩的手中，女孩本以为一切都是因为女人本来就比男人早熟的关系，所以男孩还看不透，只好处处相让，希望能盼到成熟时机~

日子久了，女孩和男孩从来都没有真正的吵过，只是会怄怄气，不和对方交谈而已，可是女孩却觉得为什么多的时候都要女孩让步才得以解脱，为什么男孩就不能像个男子汉大丈夫一样的让步呢？女孩这才知道原来男孩并不符合女孩的择偶条件，但也知道这都只是自私的想法，所以也只让过去成为过去，毕竟这一段感情是女孩在众多的感情里最费心思的一段~

女孩很是矛盾，不知为何在男孩面前总是表现得如此懦弱，从来对自己都没放松过的女孩总是想为什么为了讨喜男孩而不敢把自己最真实的一面都表露出来~女孩想了想，也许这就是一段不成熟的感情吧！女孩心中从来都没有过一颗实实在在的自信心，因此害怕眼前美好的一切都离女孩远去，所以只能试着讨喜男孩而把男孩留住~

女孩真的很气自己，总是在想时间都那么长了，为什么生活还是一点都没有好转过？更问自己为什么一直要承受自个儿面对所有的盲点而奋战？女孩真的很累但却从来都没有想过要放弃，可是生活上的压力逼得女孩一秒也不想闲着，只希望成熟的时刻快点到来~这样的女孩，每天都想办法让自己好过一些，正所谓“身体发肤，受之父母”，女孩真的很希望自己可以把自己的一切心思花在自己身上，不管是让自己更用工，更努力，更优雅，更高傲都好，只想让自己长成一棵花中之王，好让父母都可以清楚感觉到女孩是多么的珍惜他们给她的一切……

女孩真的很倔强，只希望不管多辛苦都要靠自己去解决，绝不能对自己松懈，所以从以前到现在女孩从都不把心事说出来，至少到现在为止不管是谁都没办法让女孩敞开心扉~

一直伴随女孩长大的并不是其他人而是与生俱来的倔强性格，女孩以前也很抗拒自己的脾气，所以下定决心至少把坏脾气改一改但却不能把这与生俱来的性格改掉，这样才不会失去自我~但是这样的道理却是女孩自个儿编的，所以一切都听天由命吧！

听天由命……你相信吗？缘分……你相信吗？可女孩两个都相信了，所以女孩相信一切听天由命就是她现在的生存之道，因为女孩相信一切的命运和缘分都会有好的结局~

A Sustainable & Fulfilling Life

I am quite contradiction to my life now, should say that I like or I hate? I don't know, I can't even find a person to talk about it. It is true, that is nobody that I can talk or discuss to, I am always living my life in  my own hand, when I felt hard to do, to solve or to decide something, I will just try to find any one and ask, I won't promise that I will 100% believe in them, I will just use their advise or opinion for my own references only, I don't know this is correct or not and I don't want to know too, perhaps this is how I presence myself. My friends said that is because I don't believe in them but is that the truth? I don't know, I just know that not all the advise and opinion is suit to me, therefore I just can use it as my references. If people say that I don't believe to those people that giving me the information or opinion, I just can say that if I am not believe in them then I will not take theirs opinion in my consideration and those people who are saying like that is just because that I didn't follow the way that they advised me so they are saying that I am not believe in them. I am just try to keep my own way to live in my life, that is the reason I don't like those people that like to use theirs friends opinion to complete their assignment, and this is the problem that I faced now actually. Perhaps they are not confident to their own way but, what I can do? I just can follow the majority to finish the assignment since that is a group assignment not individual. I won't worry that how people look or talk about me, I just know that is my own way and it is my personalities, I don't want to change it because I don't think it is a bad-personality. People might say that I am always have the right and I am always correct, perhaps I am; I don't know but why people can't accept my personalities? I might don't like the way that others people do it but I am still will try to accept it, I will not try to change your personalities because of I dislike it, you just can be yourself but why not others do it to me too? I don't know why, old people always say that "people will treat you back depends on how you treat others"; maybe this is the fact that I treat people in my life.

Its difficult to have a healthier live when you need to take care your work, study, entertainment, sport, financial management and own behavior controlling at the same time, I just can satisfied by replacing my entertainment time with my sport time for this moment~ Even I am satisfied but I am angry about my time management and my laziness too, I understood that was not much time for me to do my school work and homework but it was a very tiring life if I keep all the things in balance. Seriously, I just can relax my mind during the entertainment and sport time; so if my life are all about the work, study, money and behavior controlling, I think I will become crazy. I am keep finding a balancing life to achieve a healthier life, but it since like very difficult. I believe that was my destiny when there is more challenging life came to me, and I will accept those challenges to improve my liberal and knowledge, I believe that my family waiting for this too, so I would not escape, I will prove that I will proceed my life without any regret~

The Mean of My Own

How hard for me to find a topic or channel for my blog and how hard for me to describe in English; but I won't give up, I will try my best to improve. Well, I was a kind of people that don't like to have a limit for myself, I like to challenge I like to learn and I like to surpass myself too. For me, it was stupid thinking of girl should not do this or guy should not do that or vice versa; it was 2012 now, this thinking must have an improvement and it must have a balancing between this. BALANCE, is a very important word and it is very difficult to achieve. I have the confident to say that not much people can achieve balancing in their life in this world and I wish this word can be the target for the human that who are living in this planet. Everything is need balancing, without balancing, the whole thing will be fall or fail. To achieve a balancing life, we need to earn a lot of experience, without experience we cant even have an improvement for our life, that's the reason old people are very important in each family but, be careful, every opinion that from old people or others is only an aid that helping us in decision making so PLEASE don't let all the opinion to make the decision for you. DECISION, is also a very important word for me, a lot of people are worried about which decision better or which is the correct decision included me, that is nobody can predict what will be happen in the future, that's the reason we need to make the decision by ourselves, we need to try and experience all the decision that we had decided then we just know whether the decision is suit to us or not. For me again, it wouldn't  have the wrong decision in this world because each decision that we had experienced is helpful, we can know which decision is suit to us after that. People will conclude that the decision is wrong when the decision is not suitable to them, but it is nothing wrong for me, it just a decision that not suitable and it might suitable to other. Therefore for me, there is no wrong decision, so don't be regret for the non-suitable decision, it will become a valuable experience for our life. Just learn from the experiences, it will be very interesting. :)

从东猛出来的一个女生

时间，一分一秒的过；
一件本来不被赞成的事情就这样过了三年，在外面过着从来都预想不到的日子，一个仅仅只有十八岁的女生从小被外婆宠爱了十二年，来到另一个环境过了五年中学生的生活，中学毕业了以后再次来到一个对语言，人和事都陌生的环境下生活，真不敢相信在这样的环境下已经过了三年，现在想想这个女生应该也成长了不少吧！

短短的三年说长不长，说短不短，但是成长是应该要有一点的吧！有时候觉得成长是成长了，但总是不稳定，一点也不实在，也许这种感觉是人生的必经路途吧！人生本来就有许许多多的路径，大路小路都由你自己决定怎么走，决定好了以后就应该背上路途中所应该要面对的困难，当你对这些困难迎刃而解的时候，就意味着你这时候才是真正的长大了，所以当你走完了这一段路了以后是不是觉得实在很多稳定很多呢？这种感觉想必对这个女生还早着呢！不过相信这个女生走完这段路以后一定也会感觉到这种实在和稳定的感觉~